Its not inducing any shivers. I just feel.. alone. And it has been so long since I am who I was. And this has made me lost touch with what should be an intuitive process– now becomes a long flowchart in my mind. Socializing. I used to know to. Keep things upbeat, but now ever since I have this “fuck all these shit”, “why bother”, etc. It has been very difficult.
I guess my personality adapted to being alone, and now not being alone just comes with this certain awkwardness that shun people off.
Do I want people to be away? Or am I just waiting for someone to care just enough to get through this hard shell I made, and ever since– been living in.
